I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Randomize
