Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
He did a backflip because drugs
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
