Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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