new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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