Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She's the barista slut.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
