Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
