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• (916): View more from California

  she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  i would rim the shit out of meg ryan

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• (813): View more from Florida

  hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.

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• (914): View more from New York

  We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.

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• (631): View more from New York

  these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.

  (631): View more from New York

  i got hit in the ear.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (817): View more from Texas

  Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet

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