You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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