just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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