Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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