I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Randomize