Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup. http://tfl.nu/hrhi
  Replies (14) Good night (868) Bad night (1357)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though. http://tfl.nu/zzah
  Replies (18) Good night (6404) Bad night (708)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (862): Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip http://tfl.nu/drj8
  Replies (15) Good night (2135) Bad night (6086)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): 50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin. http://tfl.nu/4pfl
  Replies (10) Good night (2163) Bad night (999)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls http://tfl.nu/30m5
  Replies (11) Good night (1203) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon

  (1-262): View more from Wisconsin

  That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon (1-262): That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months http://tfl.nu/99ql
  Replies (1) Good night (1701) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia. http://tfl.nu/jl72
  Replies (6) Good night (491) Bad night (1116)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind. http://tfl.nu/wqhb
  Replies (4) Good night (1123) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water. http://tfl.nu/gx4i
  Replies (2) Good night (1034) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine http://tfl.nu/jea9
  Replies (1) Good night (905) Bad night (501)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina http://tfl.nu/n2kg
  Replies (3) Good night (1113) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious. http://tfl.nu/mvzv
  Replies (4) Good night (1103) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room http://tfl.nu/ovpj
  Replies (6) Good night (805) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game. http://tfl.nu/bv7v
  Replies (0) Good night (563) Bad night (362)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.

  (1-714): View more from California

  DAD WTF

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning. (1-714): DAD WTF http://tfl.nu/ld6i
  Replies (3) Good night (487) Bad night (625)

Randomize