Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
