went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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