I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
