It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
