Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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