I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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