you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
