So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
