I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
