margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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