plz talk dirty to me
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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