Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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