Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize