Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
