Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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