I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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