This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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