yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
