So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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