I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
