I think I am morally bankrupt
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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