Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
