Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  your room smells of hookers.

  (904): View more from Florida

  And success

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  (310): your room smells of hookers. (904): And success http://tfl.nu/jlzy
  Replies (10) Good night (1768) Bad night (422)
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  (925): View more from California

  If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.

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  (925): If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying. http://tfl.nu/0bns
  Replies (22) Good night (2901) Bad night (688) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined

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  (310): it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined http://tfl.nu/11oi
  Replies (15) Good night (8357) Bad night (671) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  i'll start checking the bushes on campus.

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  (778): so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually.. (250): i'll start checking the bushes on campus. http://tfl.nu/j3zu
  Replies (34) Good night (5422) Bad night (1292)
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  (516): View more from New York

  She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning

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  (516): She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning http://tfl.nu/jaay
  Replies (12) Good night (1601) Bad night (6565) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways

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  (203): I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways http://tfl.nu/010i
  Replies (14) Good night (1155) Bad night (4868) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.

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  (724): Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that. http://tfl.nu/gvw5
  Replies (8) Good night (1906) Bad night (965) Order T-Shirt
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.

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  (780): The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone. http://tfl.nu/xun1
  Replies (4) Good night (1918) Bad night (656) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me

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  (970): Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me http://tfl.nu/7cqx
  Replies (5) Good night (2298) Bad night (531) Order T-Shirt
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  (949): View more from California

  I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.

  (949): View more from California

  In a moving vehicle and other people in the car

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  (949): I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket. (949): In a moving vehicle and other people in the car http://tfl.nu/58wf
  Replies (7) Good night (1213) Bad night (386)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever

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  (715): I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever http://tfl.nu/rkkg
  Replies (3) Good night (1355) Bad night (346)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.

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  (313): Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me. http://tfl.nu/c83j
  Replies (5) Good night (1158) Bad night (335) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show

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  (719): Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show http://tfl.nu/2ff1
  Replies (4) Good night (746) Bad night (420) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming

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  (615): Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming http://tfl.nu/odmb
  Replies (4) Good night (1056) Bad night (207) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know

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  (908): We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know http://tfl.nu/8q22
  Replies (5) Good night (620) Bad night (188) Order T-Shirt

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