It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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