If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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