Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
