After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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