just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
