'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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