Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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