The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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