paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As shirtless as possible
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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