Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
