Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize