the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
