Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
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