I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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