There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
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