I'm pants shitting drunk right now
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
